Introduction
A tasty gluten-free pie crust is a game-changer for those with gluten sensitivities. Nothing beats the comforting aroma of a freshly baked pie. The ultimate guide to gluten-free pie crusts will reveal how to make flaky and flavorful crusts without gluten. This article provides valuable insights and a foolproof recipe for gluten-free pie crust success, regardless of whether you're a newbie or an experienced baker.
Importance of Gluten-Free Options
Gluten-free diets have gained popularity for various reasons, including celiac disease, personal dietary choices, or gluten intolerance. Gluten-free options allow individuals to enjoy their favorite treats without compromising their health or taste preferences.
Challenges of Gluten-Free Pie Crust
Creating a gluten-free pie crust comes with unique challenges. Gluten provides elasticity and structure to traditional pie crusts, so achieving a tender and flaky texture can be more difficult. However, with the right techniques and ingredients, you can overcome these challenges and create a delectable gluten-free pie crust.
Key Ingredients for a Perfect Gluten-Free Pie Crust
To create the ultimate gluten-free pie crust, it's essential to understand the main ingredients that blend perfectly with its texture and flavor:

1. Gluten-Free Flour Blends: Using a single gluten-free flour can be challenging for replicating the texture of traditional pie crusts. However, combining different flours such as rice flour, tapioca flour, and almond flour helps balance flavor and texture.
2. Fats for Flakiness: Incorporating the right fats into your gluten-free pie crust is essential for achieving flakiness. Opt for ingredients like chilled butter or dairy-free alternatives like coconut oil or vegan margarine.
3. Binding Agents: As gluten-free flours lack the binding properties of gluten, it's important to add binding agents to the pie crust. Xanthan gum or ground flaxseed mixed with water can provide the necessary structure.
4. Flavor Enhancers: Enhance the flavor of your gluten-free pie crust by adding a touch of sweetness with ingredients like sugar or maple syrup. Incorporate herbs, spices, or grated cheese for a savory crust to complement the filling.

Mastering the Technique: gluten-free pie crust game:
Perfecting the technique is crucial for achieving a successful gluten-free pie crust. Pay attention to the following steps:

1. Chilling the Ingredients: Ensure all the ingredients, including the flour blend and fats, are well chilled before starting. Cold ingredients help maintain the desired texture and prevent the fats from melting too quickly.
2. Proper Mixing: Mix the ingredients using a light hand. Over-mixing can lead to a tough crust. Instead, gently combine the flour blend, fats, binding agents, and flavor enhancers until the dough comes together.
3. Rolling Out the Dough: Roll out the gluten-free pie crust carefully to achieve the desired thickness. Sprinkle some gluten-free flour blend on the rolling surface to prevent sticking. Work slowly and patch any cracks that may occur.
4. Pre-Baking Techniques: Pre-bake the gluten-free pie crust before adding the filling to ensure a crisp crust. Blind baking helps the crust hold its shape and prevents it from becoming soggy.

Tricks and Tips for a Good Gluten-Free Pie Crust
Consider these tips and tricks to elevate your gluten-free pie crust game:

1. Avoiding Over-Mixing: As mentioned earlier, over-mixing can result in a tough crust. Instead, mix the ingredients until they come together and avoid excessive dough handling.
2. Handling the Dough with Care: Gluten-free doughs are more delicate than their gluten-containing counterparts. Handle the dough gently to prevent it from falling apart.
3. Using the Right Pie Pan: Choose a sturdy pie pan that promotes even baking. Avoid glass pans, as they may cause the bottom crust to become soggy. Opt for metal or ceramic pans instead.
4. Enhancing the Flavor: Experiment with these ideas to enhance the flavor of your gluten-free pie crust:

• Sweet and Savory Variations: You can adjust the crust's flavor depending on your pie filling. For example, add sweetness for fruit pies or incorporate savory herbs for savory pies.
• Adding Spices and Herbs: Infuse your gluten-free pie crust with additional flavor by incorporating spices like cinnamon, nutmeg, or cardamom. Fresh herbs, such as thyme or rosemary, can also add a delightful twist.
• Experimenting with Nut Flours: Swap a portion of your gluten-free flour blend with nut flour like hazelnut or almond to add a subtle nuttiness to the crust. This variation works exceptionally well for pies with nut-based fillings.

Troubleshooting Common Issues
Address these common issues when baking a gluten-free pie crust:

1. Crumbly Crusts: If your crust tends to crumble, use enough binding agents like xanthan gum or flaxseed. Additionally, handle the dough gently to prevent it from falling apart.
2. Soggy Bottoms: To prevent a soggy bottom crust, ensure you pre-bake the crust before adding the filling. This step creates a barrier that prevents excess moisture from seeping into the crust.
3. Shrinking Crusts: If your crust shrinks during baking, allow it to rest in the refrigerator before rolling it out. Additionally, avoid stretching the dough too much when transferring it to the pie pan.

Conclusion
Creating a delicious gluten-free pie crust is within your reach. You can perfect your gluten-free pie crust recipe by understanding the challenges and employing the right techniques and ingredients. Then, enjoy indulging in a delicious pie without worrying about dietary restrictions or gluten sensitivities.

Hey there, thanks for stopping by and reading my post. Title is pretty self explanatory. Looking for a fwb with a nerdy lean to have some fun with and cut through the dull routine. I am 6'1 250 with short dark brown hair and green eyes and I wear glasses.
About me nonsexually, personality wise I'm very laid back and easy going. Generally like to just go with the flow and see where things go. Planned excursions are always fun, though, too. I'm mostly a film buff. I have a staggeringly large collection of movies, mainly horror, but I also have action, comedy, anime, the MCU and some other things spread throughout it. I try to keep my taste diverse. I like to cook and I mainly aim for the citrus/spice side of things if I can help it. Not much of a sweet tooth but cheesecake is life. I am a gamer from tabletop to console. My main games are Magic: The Gathering and WH40K and I love board games too. I also like to just vibe and listen to music, my taste is all over the place so float me a recommendation or two and I'll check it out. Really into southern gothic and stuff like that lately. I also like to hike and fish, love the outdoors especially when you can just relax and enjoy the quiet on the lakes.
Sexually, I'm hypersexual. Which means my libido is cranked to 11 and going all the time. I am respectful of boundaries and such though. Sex is supposed to be fun for both people after all, if it isn't then what's the point? I run mild to wild, but I am mainly a giver. The title pretty much explains what I'm looking for, just some fun relaxing evenings hanging out and having fun. I love to give oral, use my fingers and if you want use toys. As long as you enjoy yourself and get off I'm happy.
All I ask of you is be 18+, have good hygiene, and nothing harder than weed. Don't care if you drink. I love all women, but I must admit a strong attraction to African American and Asian American women and tomboys. If you like what you've read so far feel free to hit me up. If you decide to pass me by, thanks for reading and have a great time and be safe out there.

What are these little green slightly translucent balls in a Chinese/Uyghur dish called dapanji or "big plate chicken".

1. The picture is them cooked
2. each green "ball" is about the size of a peppercorn
3. They taste citrusy, almost like lemon but not spicy or numbing at all
4. if you zoom in the husk/shell is kind of spotted

Here's the picture
https://imgur.com/HmabPrg
Extra details
I bought this dish from a Uyghur restaurant while visiting New York. This dish blew my mind and felt like discovering a new genre of food. I have to try to reverse engineer it as best I can! It was listed as chicken Laghman but given the other ingredients they used a dapanji/ big plate chicken recipe for the base.
I have looked at a few big plate chicken recipes and couldn't find an obvious match for this ingredient.
In some recipes the base broth cooks for 1hr+ and I wonder if some of the spices change appearance or flavor after that time. Brainstorming here, would either fennel seed, or Sichuan peppercorns taste and appear this way after 1hr+?
Any thoughts on what this could are welcome!!!
​
Example recipe
The recipe that I have seen to include most of the ingredients I could discern is copied and pasted below. Credit to u/mthmchris for the recipe and detailed guide.
https://www.reddit.com/Cooking/comments/7bcvarecipe\_xinjiangstyle\_dapanji\_braised\_chicken\_aka/
"So we wanted to show you how to make Uighur-style of Dapanji, a.k.a. the aptly translated ‘big plate of chicken’.
The Uighurs are a Turkish ethnic group from the Xinjiang province in the far North West of China, and have a fascinatingly awesome cuisine. They've got a solid mix of Central Asian and Northwest Chinese flavors - lamb features heavily, the grill and the tandoor's used, and they have their own version of pilaf (called 'polo' or 'shouzhuafan'). But at the same time, they'll use certain Chinese ingredients and also make use of the wok. This dish is one of the most beloved in the region, and a great place to start with Xinjiang food.
Video is here. We decided to also include in a recipe for those wide kudaimian pulled noodles that’re often served with this… but if you’re not feeling ambitious you could always opt for any sort of thick dried Asian noodles instead.
Ingredients:
One whole chicken cut into pieces -or- chicken wings, ~1.5kg. So really, the ideal sort of chicken for this dish would be an Asian variety of chicken cut into pieces across the bone... and if that's convenient for you, I'd implore you to go that route. If that sort of thing would be difficult for you to get, my sub would be chicken wings. You could cleave them in half, or honestly you could probably leave them in whole as well. I've seen some Western recipe writers call for boneless breast or thigh here, but I really think that's a dramatic reinterpretation of the dish, and you'd also run the risk of dry chicken. Wings aren't too intimidating, and the essence's the same.
Potato, 800g. Cut into large chunks. You don’t want your potatoes to be too small else they’ll end up dissolving into the braise.
Xinjiang xianjiao (线椒), ~3 minced and reconstituted -or- Hungarian Sweet Paprika, 2 tbsp -or- Sichuan Pixian Doubanjiang, 2 tbsp. So Xinjiang xianjiao is what gives the Dapanji its characteristic red color… this mild chili is super red, and dyes basically anything it touches. Now, this chili’s sort of difficult to source even in China, so substitutions might obviously be necessary. To me, this chili is very similar to a paprika chili… so if you can get your hands on some dried paprika chilis (in China, hongjiao), I think that would be the most ideal sub. Similarly, if you got some quality Hungarian sweet paprika that should also be fine. In China outside of Xinjiang the most common sub is some Sichuan Pixian doubanjiang – you can go that route too, but in my opinion I think paprika would be closer to the original. We also got a real interesting lead on what these chilis might be called in English... see the note below.
White sugar, ¼ cup This will be mixed in with a half cup of oil to make a ‘tangse’, or caramel, for the initial step of frying the chicken.
Ginger (姜), ~2 inches Cut into slices, to be fried together with the chicken.
Sichuan peppercorns (花椒), ~1 tbsp. Added when frying the chicken.
Star anise (八角), ~4. Added when frying the chicken.
Cinnamon/Cassia (桂皮), 1 stick. Added when frying the chicken. Note that this, just like what you’d get a supermarket in the West, is actually Cassia bark and not the so-called “true cinnamon” from Ceylon.
Black Cardamom (草果), 2 pod. Added when frying the chicken. Slightly crushed to open.
Dried Chaotianjiao Heaven Facing Chilis (干朝天椒), ~15. A dapanji isn’t set-your-mouth-on-fire spicy, but it should have some kick. Adding in about fifteen whole dried chilis in with your braising liquid does the job nicely (no need to deseed them). If you’re outside China, dried Thai birds eye chilis should work just as well, or you could play around with Mexican chilis (anything unsmoked from the Capsicum Annum cultivar, e.g. Arbols, would likely be fine).
Dried bay leaf (香叶), 1. To be added when braising.
Leek (大葱), ½. Cut up a half a leek into strips, these’ll be added about halfway through the braise.
Garlic, 1 head. Peel a head of garlic, these’ll be added when there’s about 15 minutes left of the braise. Note that I add the garlic a bit earlier than many recipes might (most common is to see it added five minutes until it’s finished), mostly because I fucking love munching on garlic that’s been softened in a braise.
Mild chilis, 1 small red chili (红辣椒) and one small green chili (青辣椒). Cut into wedges. Neither of these chilis are very spicy, so you could also opt for one small green or red bell pepper.
Salt, 1 tbsp. To season. If you’re using doubanjiang in the place of xianjiao chilis, cut this out.
Chicken boullion powder (鸡粉), 1 tbsp. To season.
Process, Dapanji.
If using Xinjiang xianjiao chili, finely mince and reconstitute the chili. You’re aiming to get this into a super-fine mince – if you got a food processor (we don’t), I imagine that’d be a help. Once it’s fine enough for you, add in some water – we added roughly two tablespoons. Leave that aside for about thirty minutes - the chili will end up absorbing the water and forming a sort of paste.
Prep your ingredients. I’d use that time to peel and slice your ginger, peel the potato and cut into large chunks, crush the black cardamom pods, cut the leek and mild chilis into strips/biased wedges, peel the garlic… measuring everything out so that it’s good to go once you’re ready to fry.
Blanch the chicken pieces. Blanch the chicken in boiling water for three minutes or so. Because the braise isn’t going to feature much liquid, we’re not going to be able to skim the scum, blood, and impurities from the braise. The quick blanch’ll clean our chicken right up so it’s good to braise.
Make the tangse (caramel). This is a relatively common step in many Chinese braises. To make the tangse, add in a half cup of oil and a quarter cup of sugar to a wok over medium heat. The sugar will begin to melt into the oil, and after a couple minutes it’ll deepen in color to something resembling a caramel. For this stage, it’s important that you stir constantly, and know that tangse can go from zero to midnight real quick. All in all, it’s better to have an overly blonde tangse than a burnt one.
Fry the chicken pieces in with the tangse, then add in the ginger and the salt/chicken boullion. Fry the chicken with the tangse for 30 seconds or so, then add in the ginger and fry for another 30 seconds. Sprinkle with salt and chicken boullion to season – I know it seems a bit strange to season so early in a braise, but things end up getting a bit unwieldy near the end when the potatoes are nearly dissolved.
Add in the xianjiao chili, then the Sichuan peppercorns, black cardamom, star anise, and cinnamon. Add in the xianjiao chili (or some Hungarian sweet paprika, or some Pixian doubanjiang) and coat the chicken with it. Then, add in those spices and let them fry for about 45 seconds or so until it’s all just starting to smell awesome.
Add in 400 mL of water, and nestle in your potatoes, chaotianjiao heaven facing chilis, and bay leaf. Cover and let simmer on low. 400 mL of water might feel like a bit of a small amount (it won’t cover all of your ingredients), but the idea is that the ingredients are going to steam in addition to braise. Because of that, after you cover it you really don’t want to peek. This’ll end up cooking about an hour in total – we still got three ingredients to add (the leek, the garlic, and the mild fresh chilis), so we’ll mix it when we open it up to add those ingredients.
After 30 minutes, add in the leek. At this point, the braising liquid should still look ‘water-y’ and the potatoes should be mostly intact. Toss the leek into the braising liquid, give everything a mix, and cover.
15 minutes later (45 into the braise), add in the garlic. Now the braise should start to look like it’s coming together. The very edges of the potato should be starting to dissolve – if you eat a potato it’ll be roughly cooked through but not very soft. Now, I should note that I add in the garlic a bit early – when I was researching this dish, the Han Xinjiang guy at my market was insistent that the garlic be added at the very end, five minutes before finishing. I like my garlic soft and cooked through so I can munch on it though, so I add in in here.
15 minutes later (60 minutes into the braise), add in the mild fresh chilis. These will only need five minutes or so to cook.
Serve. Serve this with the kudaimian noodles below. Generally, it's best to serve them after you've already munched on the dapanji a bit so that you can get them all in that braising liquid.
Ingredients, Kudaimian Pulled Noodles:
Bread Flour -or- Dumpling Flour (高筋面粉), 250g. Basically looking for a high gluten content, we used bread flour.
Water, 125g.
Salt, ½ tsp.
Oil. To roll the noodles in before resting.
Process, Kudaimian Pulled Noodles:
Ok, now before we get into this, a quick word of warning: hand pulled noodle making is more of a skill than a recipe. If you’re new to noodle pulling, it might take a few tries to get your noodles right – by far the most common issue is noodles that’re a bit too thick, which I’ll talk about how to save in the notes below.
Disclaimer number two… we’re not the most experienced noodle pullers. Steph’s from Guangzhou (where there’s not exactly much of a tradition of this northern-style hand pulled noodle making), so it isn’t exactly something she grew up with. To give you an idea, about a third of our noodles we had to ‘save’ using the technique in the notes.
In any event, this variety of hand pulled noodles is vastly easier than lamian, so it’s a good place to start. Also, 'Biang biang' noodles are basically the same method, but are divided into smaller pieces and cut in half lengthwise with a chopstick.
Mix together the flour and salt, then slowly incorporate the water into the dough. Rest for 10 minutes. We’ve found doing this by hand is actually a bit easier than using the stand mixer. Add the water bit by bit, kneading and incorporating it into the dough. Once the dough is doesn’t stick to the bowl anymore and has been kneaded into a ball shape, it’s done. Cover with a warm, damp towel and set it aside to let the dough relax.
Cut the dough into eight even pieces, roll them into a sort of fat ‘log’ shape, coat generously with oil, and set aside for 60 minutes. Each one of these pieces is going to make one big noodle – this is like the noodle from KenM’s nightmares. Make sure the logs are coated real well with oil, cover them with plastic wrap, and set it aside for one hour. This second rest is gunna be really critical, if it doesn’t rest for an hour, you’re not really gunna be able to pull them.
Pull the noodles. As always, when I’m trying to explain what to do with dough via the written word, I sound like a convoluted doofus, so take a look at 4:49 in the video for a visual. First thing you’ll do is flatten your log by pressing it down with your palm – the flatter it gets here, the easier it’ll be to pull. Then, grab a hold of the two edges of the log and stretch it out four times. Now this is going to start to begin to look like a noodle. Then, continue to pull and smack the noodle against the table – this smacking motion’ll help the noodle thin out in the center as well. Once the noodle’s roughly as wide as your arm span, you’re finished. Just tear off and toss the little knobs of dough where your hands were pulling from.
Boil the noodle. Boil the noodles until they float. These northwestern style noodles are a bit thicker, so it might take a minute or so.
Note on how to rescue kudaimian that’re too thick:
One of the difficulties with learning hand pulled noodles is that if you screw up, you can’t just roll it back into a ball and start over – it won’t really form because of the oil.
If your noodle’s a bit too thick, use your fingers to lightly spread it horizontally, then pass it through your middle and index fingers with both hands while lightly pressing and pulling to straighten it back out – this motion is at 5:33 in the video. Again, this isn’t really impressive or correct or anything, but it’ll thin out the noodle and everyone’ll be none the wiser (unless you’re, uh… filming yourself).
Note on other Dapanji ingredients:
So a couple things that we didn’t add that you might see in a few dapanji recipes… (1) tomato paste (2) some other spices and (3) beer.
So right, Uighurs actually do use tomato paste in some dishes – the brand of tomato paste I buy here in Shenzhen is actually from Xinjiang. You could use half Xinjiang chili and half tomato paste to get that sort of red color if you like – it might be a bit more visually appealing, as our dapanji had a number of red flakes scattered about. We opted for pure chili as we were basing the recipe off of the dapanji of our favorite Xinjiang restaurant in Shenzhen, which didn’t use tomato paste.
Also, if you poke around, you’ll see that each restaurant’ll sort of has their own spice mix. We went with a basic one that was sort of a copycat of a Uighur-run Xinjiang restaurant we love in Shenzhen (plus Bay Leaf). The most commonly added ingredient that we didn’t use would probably be fennel seed… but sometimes you’ll see some places toss some more exotic stuff in too.
Lastly, many of the recipes around Xiachufang (the Chinese AllRecipes) feature a light beer as the braising liquid. Uighurs are Muslim though, so we just opted for water. Beer wouldn’t hurt though, so if you feel like it you could toss that in as well.
Note on Xianjiao Chili:
Again, please don't hesitate to sub this. I figured it'd be almost impossible for people to find abroad, except...
I was chatting with someone on YouTube and I'm now like 70% sure that this is Kashmiri Chili. They look really, really similar, have the same purpose (red color), similar heat level (~1k scoville), and if you look at a map that pathway seems like it makes a ton of sense. You should be able to find them on Amazon - at the very least, even if they aren't the same, I think it'd be a nice sub."

POST-001) https://nehupa.co.uk/sweet-and-sour-chicken-15-minutes/
POST-002) https://nehupa.co.uk/best-ever-oatmeal-chocolate-chip-cookies/
POST-003) https://nehupa.co.uk/20-minute-cashew-chicken-better-than-takeout/
POST-004) https://nehupa.co.uk/easy-oatmeal-cookies-no-chill-one-bowl-no-mixe
POST-005) https://nehupa.co.uk/15-minute-garlic-butter-chicken-easy-stovetop-recipe/

Good Afternoon,
I am new to reddit and also new to writing with intention of other people reading it. I would like to share some of my short stories and am open to constructive input. I write because I enjoy it and I interested if anyone else does. The intention of these stories is to be include in a sort of memoi cookbook.
thank you.
Sugar High
They say that once you quit drinking your body craves sugar, I know this is very true. Before I went to rehab I really did not like sweets very much, except ice cream I always loved ice cream. Recovering addicts rely on sugar like Milli Vanilli relies on vocal tracks. Every “meal” provided the minimal amount of nutrients a person needs to stay alive. Up to this point in my life I was naively unaware of the many food types that come in powder form. There was a week that we had salt, it was amazing! For every meal there was a buffet of day old pastries laid out on each table. If you saw something you liked while waiting in line you had better grab it. Rehab cafeterias have some of the same rules as high school- it definitely matters where you sit, and a fight erupting over a cupcake was not unheard of. These self anointed kings of the streets, tough guys turn into little bitches, over the last Unicorn sprinkle cupcake at snack time. The only thing different between a group of 70 grown men and a group of 70 teenage girls, is the amount of body hair, and the maturity levels are identical.
For the better part of a year and half just being awake was enough of a reason to be drinking. There was always a nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I wouldn't have enough booze, so I carried my own everywhere I went. The thought process that decided the size of bottle I would bring depended on whether this would be my only source of booze or it was a companion bottle to accompany the cocktails I was having publicly. I would hate for people to think I was drunk and order a Vodka martini with a Jack Daniel’s chaser, I am a lady so I did my shot in the powder room. Grocery shopping was a half Pint, even though I was also buying two 1.75mL bottles for the next couple days but I couldn't wait till I got home. Work was usually a pint and half, a pint from the strip club liquor store and a couple of shots at the bar across the street when that was gone. The word addiction never crossed my mind; I was a fabulously highly functional alcoholic.
When I admitted to myself and a room full of strangers the extent and severity of my addiction, I could finally see myself, in the faces of my peers in that room and what I saw was terrifying. For the first time in my life I did not like myself, definitely did not love myself. Up to this point in my life I had an unwavering belief that I was amazing at everything I did. I knew that I succeeded because I was so confident and I was so confident because I succeeded. I felt like I had just been punched in the gut, and I lost my entire self worth in that one minute. Alcohol had taken away from me the very essence of who I am. Those early days were hard. I had to rediscover myself, I am still discovering myself. I did find my confidence again.
Geno I got sober together and it has been so great, there was a part of both of us that had been lying dormant for a little while and when it came out it came out in force. In the first month of sobriety we got to see our new niece Raelynn for the first time, around four months we had started a cookie business, restructured our lives, and by month six we had started making our 2 year plan to grow our cookie business into a national brand, and I started writing a book, yes this one.
Geno has always been the baker in the family. I started dabbling in baking right after I got out of rehab, I could not believe how much extra time I had now that I was not drinking. Geno had made an Oreo Cheesecake and it looked like so much fun. A few days passed and I wanted to make a cheesecake, so I started with a simple cheesecake, a few days later there was an apple crisp, then a couple dozen mini cheesecakes, 1-2-3-4 cake with buttercream frosting, not as easy as the name may suggest, then a couple dozen chocolate chip cookies, most of these recipes were straight forward and required no creativity and I was starting to get bored… Ooh something shiny… then Mini Lava Brownies with Chocolate Ganache Drizzle happened. *mic drop* You are welcome!
(LAVA BROWNIES WITH GANACHE DRIZZLE)
Sunset Sandwiches:
The year prior to checking myself into rehab was one self- created dumpster fire after another. One does not usually end up in rehab after a wonderfully stable year. I spent most the year running away from the people who loved me most, especially my husband, Geno. Geno and I have been through some tough times in our relationship but this year was especially awful. I believe Queen Elizebeth II called it an “Annus Horribilis”, very fitting since this was the year Windsor caught fire and I spent the entire year trying to burn my life to the ground. I was in such a dark place and didn't even realize it, it was very scary and lonely inside myself and my outward side was the complete opposite. This duality in my life caused me to create a villain and sadly that villain was Geno. At one point in May I attempted suicide and almost succeded, Geno found me on the couch and called an ambulance, I woke up 2 day later in a mental hospital on suicide watch. The scariest part about that was I had no recollection of wanting to hurt myself or even thinking it through, all I remember is seeing darkness. I came home after seven days and I really thought I would slow down on the drinking and maybe I did for a little while but not long enough to remember. I remember thinking that I was loved becaused all my friends and family were so devastated at the thought of losing me, that feeling was lost again to the booze soon after.
That summer was a rollercoaster of huge fights, extended time away from each other, terrible things were said, and in October it all reached a climax and I threatened to leave Geno and went to stay with my cousin Mandi in Wisconsin with the rest of my family. My aunt Kristy and Grandma were exactly what I knew deep down they would be, honest as fuck! My grandma told me that I was “difficult, had lived a very charmed life and I should suck it up, go home and be happy with my husband”. My Aunt Kristy was brutally honest. She sat me down and asked me “What was going on?” when I started to tell her in my sugar coated everything will be fine, she called bullshit on me. She called out my drinking and told me I didnt even “resemble her nephew.” She also told me it was time to get my shit together. Kristy fought a long hard battle with addiction and has been happily sober for many years now. She said “Honey, I missed a lot of years of my life due to addiction.” She has now forced me to feel real emotions and I am open-mouth sobbing, she goes on, “You are going to lose them too or worse you will lose everything.”
It was the first time I was forced to see myself and the disaster I had become. A week later I flew home and checked myself into rehab. It was difficult to remember how to be happy with Geno, I had to retrain myself to love him the way he deserved to be loved and to see how much he loves me. In those first weeks we spent all day everyday together, it was amazing, for the first time in a long time we were not yelling and screaming at each other. One beautiful day we decided to go to the beach for a sunset picnic, it was the first time we had gone to see the sunset since we had quit drinking. The sunset was the most beautiful orange and glorious sunset, I was finally seeing my Geno, and he was all the light I needed. That sunset I fell madly in love with my husband again, oh and we had some sandwiches!

I’ve been trying to find the name or a recipe for (I think) Italian cookies I had once. Filled with a fig mixture like cucidate but the dough was completely different - very thin and more chewy than cakey shortbready. They looked like the dough was filled and then formed into a tube and twisted past a U shape into almost a teardrop. Not very sweet. Shaped something like this

This is a vent actually. I'm exhausted. My Swedish partner and I moved from Ireland 3 months and we put in our application to be registered as living here + my application for a personnummer basically the following day. We were told it would take a while. They really stressed that we were not to bother them about it, as it would take a long time. Monday a letter comes in, saying that they sent us a letter asking for further documentations and we never answered so it's a no. We never received a letter. Never got an email, a phonecall, a notification, either of us. We go back to the center and talk to someone and he has us do the application again, while he checks on my partner's files (or however their system works idk) apparently there is straight up no trace of our application on the system. Seems like they didn't bother with us AT ALL and then randomly sent us a letter telling us to fuck off when they wanted one less problem to deal with.
When I met my partner I was living in Manchester, I'd moved there from France where I'm from and I was pretty established there with an ok job, friends and good place to live. Partner couldn't join me cause of Brexit and I was scared of moving to Sweden, so we tried Ireland for a year. If you know anything about the housing crisis there you'll know it was the worst idea I've ever had in my life. It was a horrendous year trying to survive. We gave up and in March we showed up to Malmö with a horrible burnout and permeating sense of failure.
I plunged into a deep depression when everything that made me so good at my job in Ireland is impossible for me to achieve here due to language barrier (I was hotel reception manager). Then I didn't get accepted for the university program I'd applied to. Then my partner couldn't manage to get a job. Me neither. Then we got my partner's cat back from his mom's, our sweet baby that we missed so much for a year and thought about constantly and we did so much to get him back - then he died of liver failure after 2 months. Then our €500 bike got stolen. Now I'm here, short €850 from our cat dying on top of everything else, and I'm just waiting to get a personnummer so I can finally get SFI classes and start having a life.
Then we have to start the process all over again.
I'm broken. I can't focus, I'm just numb. I try to study by myself but it's hard for me to learn outside a class environment. And there's so much pressure sometimes I just kind of lose it and start sobbing over a few words I can't pronounce right. I'm trying to put together a showreel so I can send it around to animation studios around Sweden and Denmark - I quit the field 5 years ago (due to a burnout...) but it's a field where I could get away with speaking english, so I do what I need to do. But the pressure is so high I feel frozen half the time.
I'm scared of everything. I'm scared of going outside. I keep thinking about my cat's limp body when the vet took him away in a towel. I spent years taking back control of my life and healing from PTSD and I'd become such a capable person and I was so proud of who I'd become and now, here I'm nothing at all. I at least want to not be a ghost in the system. I'd like some healthcare. Everything in my life has just gone wrong for the past year. I'm scared shitless about my future. I feel like I've fucked my own life over, and I don't even have a swedish phone number to show for it.
Sorry about the rant I just don't have anyone to talk to. I don't know you guys but I just wanted you to know that every morning I wake up and do the dishes and open up Babbel for 10 minutes and spend the rest of my day trying to will myself into creating images in the vague hope that I might make some money out of it, all instead of just going out to the lake and fucking drowning myself which would honestly be easier. And I'd like a medal.

So it's been about ten years since my last trip. It was an extremely intense trip on a heroic dose camping on the top of Lake tahoe. Decided I would start light and eat .5g of dried albino penis envy. Didn't really have a plan going into it as I was expecting to not feel much. Thought I would try to play a video game and listen to music. Ate them at 10:30 and about an hour after ingestion I could start to kind of tell it was kicking in. I had a long day beforehand and was feeling tired, the yawns started kicking in and I couldn't focus on the game. Was a pretty mild feeling though compared to previous experiences. Not sure what the affects were going to be I had setup a uv reactive tapestry with a meditating Chakra figure over a mandala under a ceiling fan and then put one of those skylights that has rotating stars pointed at it. Was a real mood setter lol. Anyway the yawns were getting the best of me and I thought well if this is all it's going to be I'll just lay down with my dog and cats and watch Sweet Tooth on Netflix, had never seen it. That show was a whole vibe and my trip started coming in more than I expected. Ended up peaking for about 2 hours and going on an adventure with this little deer kid. I was loving it but when the show would get a little too intense I would go over to the Chakra setup and sort of recenter myself. Didnt have hardcore visuals but everything was super flowy and the colors were so vivid. The experience lasted around 4 hours before I could finally get to sleep. Overall it was a fun experience but I think I prefer a group setting over solo. Just didn't really know what to do with myself once it really kicked in. Although Gus, Pubba and Jep did a great job of keeping me company lol. Don't know why I felt the need to post but it's good to be back to exploring the other side. Have about 1.5g left and am contemplating taking them all next time but would still be fun to split it 3 more times.

Omnivoracious Listeners New Music Newsletter (Week of June 3rd):
New LPs:
🇬🇧 Aeffect - 'Theory of Mind' (Genre: Death Metal)
🇬🇧 Akilla - 'The Gods Have Spoken' (Genre: Melodic Death Metal)
🇺🇸 A Man Named Onigumo - 'Ingested Torment' (Genre: Brutal Death Metal)
🇩🇰 Anubis Gate - 'Interference' (Genre: Prog Power Metal)
🇬🇷 Aran Angmar - 'Atavism & Dying Stars' (Genre: Black Metal)
🇫🇮 Atlases - 'Between the Day & I' (Genre: Post-Metal)
🇺🇸 Avenged Sevenfold - 'Life Is but a Dream' (Genre: Heavy Metal)
🇺🇸 Beach Fossils - 'Bunny' (Genre: Indie Rock)
🇺🇸 Ben Folds - 'What Matters Most' (Genre: Alt Rock, Power Pop)
🇺🇸 Ben Harper - 'Wide Open Light' (Genre: Folk Rock, Blues Rock)
🇺🇸 Body Stuff - 'Body Stuff 4' (Genre: Indie Rock)
🇦🇺 Body Type - 'Expired Candy' (Genre: Post-Punk, Garage Rock)
🇺🇸 Bongzilla - 'Dab City' (Genre: Stoner Metal)
🇺🇸 Buckcherry - 'Vol. 10' (Genre: Sleaze Rock, Hard Rock)
🇺🇸 Buggin - 'Concrete Cowboys' (Genre: Hardcore Punk)
🇺🇸 Bully - 'Lucky for You' (Genre: Alt Rock)
🇺🇸 Burnt Skull - 'Daylight Mutilation' (Genre: Industrial Metal)
🇪🇸 Cabaret Aberrante - 'Brutalofilia' (Genre: Death Metal)
🇷🇺 Cadaver Carnivore - 'Devouring Eclipse of Darkest Realm' (Genre: Death Metal)
🇮🇩 Cadavoracity - 'Cadavoracity' (Genre: Brutal Death Metal)
🇷🇺 Chernaya Rechka (Черная Речка) - 'Chernaya Rechka (Черная Речка)' (Genre: Indie Rock, Post-Punk)
🇺🇸 Chip & the Charge Ups - 'What Happened to the Boy Next Door?' (Genre: Power Pop)
🇺🇸 Coffin Prick - 'Laughing' (Genre: Art Rock)
🇦🇺 Cold Irons Bound - 'No Place I Can't Find You' (Genre: Alt Country, Power Pop)
🇬🇧 Comedy of Errors - 'Threnody for a Dead Queen' (Genre: Prog Rock)
🇬🇧 Comet Gain - 'The Misfit Jukebox' (Genre: Indie Pop, Indie Rock)
🇩🇪 Cosmic Burial - 'Far Away From Home' (Genre: Atmo Black Metal)
🇨🇦 Cowboy Junkies - 'Such Ferocious Beauty' (Genre: Alt Country, Folk Rock)
🇦🇺 Dan Cribb & the Isolated - 'I'll Follow You Anywhere' (Genre: Skate Punk)
🇺🇸 Dead Billionaires - 'Disaster Preparedness Coloring Book' (Genre: Punk Rock)
🇮🇹 Death Dies - 'Stregoneria' (Genre: Black Metal)
🇮🇩 Demented Heart - 'Frantic Epidemic' (Genre: Tech Death)
🇵🇱 Dieth - 'To Hell and Back' (Genre: Death Thrash)
🇺🇸 DiGelsomnia - 'Sic Itur Ad Astra' (Genre: Doom Metal)
🇬🇧 Dog Tired - 'The Red Verse' (Genre: Groove Metal)
🇺🇸 Don't Sleep - 'See Change' (Genre: Hardcore Punk)
🇳🇴 Einar Solberg (Of Leprous) - '16' (Genre: Prog Rock, Prog Metal)
🇫🇮 Endless Exam - 'Voice of Passion and Agony' (Genre: Pop Metal)
🇮🇪 Extranauts - 'The Alchemist' (Genre: Psych Rock, Electronic Rock)
🇩🇪 Fjoergyn - 'Judasmesse' (Genre: Symphonic Black Metal)
🇺🇸 Foo Fighters - 'But Here We Are' (Genre: Alt Rock)
🇨🇦 Frankiie - 'Between Dreams' (Genre: Indie Pop, Dreampop)
🇺🇸 From Those Ashes - 'Dush Descending// Dawn Ascending' (Genre: Melodic Death Metal, Metalcore)
🇨🇱 Funeral Fullmoon - 'Unholy Kingdom of Diabolic Emperors' (Genre: Black Metal)
🇯🇵 Galileo Galilei - 'Bee and the Whales' (Genre: Indie Rock)
🇺🇸 Gal Pal - 'This and Other Gestures' (Genre: Indie Rock, Shoegaze)
🇺🇸 Geist of Ouachita - 'Imprisoned in the Graven Wood' (Genre: Black Metal)
🇺🇸 Generationals - 'Heatherhead' (Genre: Indie Pop Rock)
🇬🇧 Gloryhammer - 'Return to the Kingdom of Fife' (Genre: Power Metal)
🇺🇸 Gorgeous - 'Sapsucker' (Genre: Math Rock, Post-Punk)
🇮🇹 Graveworm - 'Killing Innocence' (Genre: Symphonic Black Metal)
🇺🇸 Gringo Star - 'On and on and Gone' (Genre: Psych Pop, Surf Rock)
🇪🇸 Halflighted - 'Obloquy' (Genre: Death Doom)
🇨🇦 Half Moon Run - 'Salt' (Genre: Indie Rock)
🇺🇸 Heldscålla - 'Two Cathedrals' (Genre: Stoner Doom)
🇺🇸 Hellwitch - 'Annihilational Intercention' (Genre: Tech Death, Thrash)
🇲🇹 Hemplifier - 'The Stoner Side of the Doom' (Genre: Stoner Doom)
🇦🇹 Hills Like White Lions - 'Meander' (Genre: Prog Metal, Post-Metal)
🇬🇧 Hugh Sheehan - 'Shapes That Are Different' (Genre: Indie Folk Rock)
🇷🇺 Infiltration - 'Cognitive Warfare' (Genre: Death Metal)
🇦🇺 Isua - 'Abandon' (Genre: Sludge Doom)
🇺🇸 Jake Shears - 'Last Man Dancing' (Genre: Glam Rock)
🇺🇸 John Mellencamp - 'Orpheus Descending' (Genre: Heartland Rock)
🇩🇪 Karbholz - 'Kapitel 10: Wilde Augen' (Genre: Indie Punk)
🇺🇸 Kiltro - 'Underbelly' (Genre: Post-Rock)
🇮🇹 Klidas - 'No Harmony' (Genre: Experimental Rock)
🇦🇺 Kodiak Empire - 'The Great Acceleration' (Genre: Prog Rock, Experimental Rock)
🇺🇸 Koningsor - 'Death Process' (Genre: Hardcore Punk, Metalcore)
🇳🇴 Kvad - 'So Old' (Genre: Atmo Black Metal)
🇬🇧 Lanterns on the Lake Version - 'Versions of Us' (Genre: Indie Rock)
🇺🇸 Leathürbitch - 'Shattered Vanity' (Genre: Heavy Metal, Hard Rock)
🇺🇸 Lightning Strikes Across the Sky - 'Cosmopolis Macabre' (Genre: Black Metal)
🇺🇸 Lonestar - 'Ten to 1' (Genre: Country)
🇬🇧 Lost Under Heaven - 'Something Is Announced by Your Life!' (Genre: Psych Rock, Indie Rock)
🇺🇸 Louise Post (Of Veruca Salt) - 'Sleepwalker' (Genre: Alt Rock)
🇺🇸 Lovelytheband - 'If We're Being Honest' (Genre: Indie Pop Rock)
🇳🇱 Man as Plague - 'Titanomachy' (Genre: Deathcore)
🇺🇸 Messiahvore - 'Transverse' (Genre: Sludge Stoner)
🇩🇪 Minas Morgul - 'Nebelung' (Genre: Black Metal)
🇮🇳 Moral Collapse - 'Divine Prosthetics' (Genre: Prog Death)
🇸🇪 Mörkvind - 'Höstbränder' (Genre: Folk Metal)
🇺🇸 Mountain Echoes - 'Rebuilding' (Genre: Indie Rock)
🇺🇸 Necrofier - 'Burning Shadows in the Southern Night' (Genre: Melodic Black Metal)
🇬🇧 Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds - 'Council Skies' (Genre: Alt Rock)
🇯🇵 OCEANS - 'SEE YOU' (Genre: Indie Rock, J-Rock)
🇺🇸 OK Goodnight - 'The Fox & the Bird' (Genre: Prog Rock)
🇬🇧 Order of Decay - 'Mortification Rites' (Genre: Blackened Doom, Death)
🇯🇵 Organic Call - '夢泳ぐ鵠の行方' (Genre: J-Rock)
🇨🇦 Owls & Eagles - 'Patience Vol. 1' (Genre: Psych Doom)
🇺🇸 Pagan Athletes - 'Landlocked' (Genre: Noise Rock)
🇺🇸 Primordial Doom - 'Doom Rising' (Genre: Doom Metal)
🇨🇦 Priors - 'Daffodil' (Genre: Punk Rock)
🇺🇸 Project: Roenwolfe - 'Project: Roenwolfe' (Genre: Power, Thrash Metal)
🇺🇸 Protomartyr - 'Formal Growth in the Desert' (Genre: Post-Punk, Gothic Rock)
🇺🇸 Prydain - 'The Gates of Aramore' (Genre: Symphonic Power Metal)
🇬🇧 Pupil Slicer - 'Blossom' (Genre: Mathcore)
🇺🇸 Purr - 'Who Is Afraid of Blue?' (Genre: Indie Pop Rock)
🇩🇰 Quiet Sonia - 'QS' (Genre: Chamber Rock, Chamber Folk)
🇺🇸 Rancid - 'Tomorrow Never Comes' (Genre: Punk Rock)
🇺🇸 Reckless Son - 'Reckless Son' (Genre: Folk Rock)
🇨🇦 Red Cain - 'Näe’bliss' (Genre: Prog Groove Metal)
🇺🇦 Risin Sabotage - 'Macabre' (Genre: Stoner Rock)
🇺🇸 Rival Sons - 'Darkfighter' (Genre: Hard Blues Rock)
🇮🇹 Rod Sacred - 'Another Day' (Genre: Heavy Metal)
🇬🇧 Ruen Brothers - 'Ten Paces' (Genre: Folk Rock)
🇦🇺 RVG - 'Brain Worms' (Genre: Alt Rock, Post-Punk)
🇳🇴 Saint Karloff - 'Paleolithic War Crimes' (Genre: Stoner Metal, Stoner Rock)
🇩🇪 Scarnival - 'The Hell Within' (Genre: Melodic Death Metal)
🇪🇸 Scent of Death - 'Into Everlasting Hate' (Genre: Tech Death)
🇺🇸 Scoville Unit - 'See What Can Be' (Genre: Punk Rock)
🇯🇵 SHIFT_CONTROL - 'MakeMyName' (Genre: Alt Rock)
🇺🇸 Shinzon - 'Mimic' (Genre: Dreampop, Prog Rock)
🇬🇷 Slaughtered Priest - 'Bang Your Head for Satan' (Genre: Black, Thrash, Speed)
🇺🇸 Smokey Brights - 'Levitator' (Genre: Indie Pop Rock)
🇨🇦 Sorry Girls - 'Bravo!' (Genre: Synthpop)
🇺🇸 Suffocate Faster - 'This Is the Way Vol. 1' (Genre: Hardcore Punk)
🇨🇭 Superdark - 'So Far Out There' (Genre: Psych Rock)
🇺🇸 Tanya Tucker - 'Sweet Western Sound' (Genre: Country)
🇺🇸 Terry Ohms - 'Rock Songs' (Genre: Psych Rock)
🇨🇦 Thantifaxath - 'Hive Mind Narcosis' (Genre: Black Metal)
🇺🇸 The Aces - 'I've Loved You for So Long' (Genre: New Wave, Synthpop)
🇬🇧 The Alarm - 'Forwards' (Genre: Alt Rock, New Wave)
🇺🇸 The Anix - 'Nightvision' (Genre: Alt Rock)
🇺🇸 The Aquadolls - 'Charmed' (Genre: Alt Rock)
🇦🇺 The Hard-Ons - 'Ripper 23' (Genre: Punk Rock)
🇧🇪 The Immortal Samsara Travelers - 'Hanging Gardens in Glacial Apocha' (Genre: Doom Metal)
🇸🇬 The Ironfist - 'Tyrant's Return' (Genre: Black Thrash)
🇧🇷 The Kryptik - 'A Journey to the Darkest Kingdom' (Genre: Black Metal)
🇳🇴 The Mansters - 'Lessons in Giving Up' (Genre: Punk Rock, Hardcore Punk)
🇺🇸 The Rallies - 'It Must Be Love' (Genre: Power Pop, Jangle Pop)
🇺🇸 The Revivalists - 'Pour It Out Into the Night' (Genre: Alt Rock, Roots Rock)
🇬🇧 The Royston Club - 'Shaking Hips and Crashing Cars' (Genre: Indie Rock)
🇺🇸 The Stools - 'R U Saved?' (Genre: Punk Blues)
🇺🇸 This White Mountain - 'Icons of the Melancholy' (Genre: Atmo Black Metal)
🇪🇪 Thunraz - 'Revelation' (Genre: Death, Industrial Metal)
🇬🇧 Tigercub - 'The Perfume of Decay' (Genre: Alt Rock, Stoner Rock)
🇺🇸 Title Holder - 'What Better Time' (Genre: Ska Punk)
🇺🇸 Tombstalker - 'Age of Darkness' (Genre: Blackened Death Metal)
🇬🇧 Tortured Demon - 'Rise of the Lifeless' (Genre: Thrash Metal, Metalcore)
🇧🇾 Trollwald - 'Trollwald' (Genre: Folk Metal, Stoner Metal)
🇮🇹 True Sleeper - 'Loving You in Parallel Dimensions' (Genre: Shoegaze, Psych Rock)
🇸🇪 Tyrann - 'Besatt' (Genre: Heavy Metal)
🇺🇸 Unfurl - 'Ascension' (Genre: Sludge Metal, Post-Hardcore)
🇯🇵 Veiyadra - 'Amalgam in Chaos' (Genre: Brutal Death Metal)
🇺🇸 Viana Valentine - 'Fever Dream' (Genre: Indie Pop Rock)
🇺🇸 Vide - 'The Parish' (Genre: DSBM)
🇺🇸 Void Ov Nihility - 'Above the Stars of God' (Genre: Death Black)
🇺🇸 Vörst - 'Burn the Priest' (Genre: Black Metal)
🇺🇸 Vulture Feather - 'Liminal Fields' (Genre: Post-Punk, Indie Punk)
🇺🇸 Water Damage - '2 Songs' (Genre: Drone, Experimental Rock)
🇺🇸 Weep - 'Life in Shades of Grey' (Genre: Post-Black Metal, Post-Hardcore)
🇸🇪 Writing the Future - 'Caught Between Heaven & Hell' (Genre: Metalcore)
🇬🇧 Wytch Hazel - 'IV: Sacrament' (Genre: Hard Rock, Heavy Metal)
🇨🇳 噬湖 - '茫茫集' (Genre: Folk Metal)
New EPs:
🇺🇸 American Nightmare - 'Dedicated to the Next World' (Genre: Hardcore Punk)
🇫🇮 Blåådpalt - 'Caedite Eos' (Genre: Death Metal)
🇪🇸 Boneyard - 'Ghoulish Tunes' (Genre: Death Metal, Grindcore)
🇺🇸 Evelyn Cools - 'Wilder Mind' (Genre: Folk Rock, Folk Pop)
🇬🇧 Damim - 'World Turned Hell' (Genre: Prog Black Death)
🇬🇧 Hallan - 'The Noise of a Firing Gun' (Genre: Punk Rock)
🇺🇸 Joan Jett and the Blackhearts - 'Mindset' (Genre: Hard Rock, Power Pop)
🇬🇧 King of the Dead - 'Perdition' (Genre: Alt Rock)
🇺🇸 Lacerated - 'The Beauty of Agony' (Genre: Death Metal, Punk Rock)
🇺🇸 Laniidae - 'Episodes: I-V' (Genre: Metalcore)
🇨🇦 Moving City - 'Snacks' (Genre: Indie Rock, Pop Rock)
🇫🇮 Omnium Gatherum - 'Slasher' (Genre: Melodic Death Metal)
🇩🇪 Peace of Mind - 'Life Long Tragedy' (Genre: Hardcore Punk)
🇺🇸 Queen Kona - 'All Hail' (Genre: Metalcore)
🇬🇧 Simulation Defect - 'Within the Threshold' (Genre: Prog Tech Deathcore, Djent)
🇦🇺 Surprise Chef - 'Friendship' (Genre: Funk, Jazz Fusion)
🇸🇪 To Descend - 'Mindless Birth' (Genre: Death Metal)
🇺🇸 Ukko's Hammer - 'Toil' (Genre: Crossover Thrash)
🇺🇸 Uncured - 'My Design' (Genre: Prog Death, Groove Metal)
🇬🇧 Visions From Beyond - 'Portal to Inertia' (Genre: Death Doom)
🇺🇸 Wretched Hallucination - 'Self' (Genre: Stoner Sludge Doom)
🇺🇸 Young the Giant - 'Both Sides' (Genre: Alt Rock)
New Remixes:
🇺🇸 A Place to Bury Strangers - 'See Through You Rerealised' (Genre: Post-Punk, Noise Rock)
Another big week to kick off the month! And I had the extra time to actually get ahead on the spreadsheet again! (You can see this in the server) Hope you find something great!
https://discord.gg/V5fZ38KSCY
If you see this message and have a release/know of one I haven't added, DM me on whatever platform you're on!
Happy Listening!

So I made cake today using Preppy Kitchen's recipe. Not sure if I'm allowed to include links, but it's the one called Strawberry Cake on his website.
The two cakes turned out very thin, and seemed like they didn't rise at all (each about an inch in height, at most). Granted, I did use 1 and a half cups of sugar instead of 2 cups for the cake batter - but I found that it was already quite sweet. Would there be any other possible explanation? Thanks!

Good Afternoon,
I am new to reddit and also a new to writing with intention of other people reading it. I would like to share some of my short stories and am open to constructive input. Please do not be negative or judgemental. I write because I enjoy it and I interested if anyone else does. The intention of these stories is to be include in a sort of memoi cookbook
thank you
Sugar High
They say that once you quit drinking your body craves sugar, I know this is very true. Before I went to rehab I really did not like sweets very much, except ice cream I always loved ice cream. Recovering addicts rely on sugar like Milli Vanilli relies on vocal tracks. Every “meal” provided the minimal amount of nutrients a person needs to stay alive. Up to this point in my life I was naively unaware of the many food types that come in powder form. There was a week that we had salt, it was amazing! For every meal there was a buffet of day old pastries laid out on each table. If you saw something you liked while waiting in line you had better grab it. Rehab cafeterias have some of the same rules as high school- it definitely matters where you sit, and a fight erupting over a cupcake was not unheard of. These self anointed kings of the streets, tough guys turn into little bitches, over the last Unicorn sprinkle cupcake at snack time. The only thing different between a group of 70 grown men and a group of 70 teenage girls, is the amount of body hair, and the maturity levels are identical.
For the better part of a year and half just being awake was enough of a reason to be drinking. There was always a nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I wouldn't have enough booze, so I carried my own everywhere I went. The thought process that decided the size of bottle I would bring depended on whether this would be my only source of booze or it was a companion bottle to accompany the cocktails I was having publicly. I would hate for people to think I was drunk and order a Vodka martini with a Jack Daniel’s chaser, I am a lady so I did my shot in the powder room. Grocery shopping was a half Pint, even though I was also buying two 1.75mL bottles for the next couple days but I couldn't wait till I got home. Work was usually a pint and half, a pint from the strip club liquor store and a couple of shots at the bar across the street when that was gone. The word addiction never crossed my mind; I was a fabulously highly functional alcoholic.
When I admitted to myself and a room full of strangers the extent and severity of my addiction, I could finally see myself, in the faces of my peers in that room and what I saw was terrifying. For the first time in my life I did not like myself, definitely did not love myself. Up to this point in my life I had an unwavering belief that I was amazing at everything I did. I knew that I succeeded because I was so confident and I was so confident because I succeeded. I felt like I had just been punched in the gut, and I lost my entire self worth in that one minute. Alcohol had taken away from me the very essence of who I am. Those early days were hard. I had to rediscover myself, I am still discovering myself. I did find my confidence again.
Geno I got sober together and it has been so great, there was a part of both of us that had been lying dormant for a little while and when it came out it came out in force. In the first month of sobriety we got to see our new niece Raelynn for the first time, around four months we had started a cookie business, restructured our lives, and by month six we had started making our 2 year plan to grow our cookie business into a national brand, and I started writing a book, yes this one.
Geno has always been the baker in the family. I started dabbling in baking right after I got out of rehab, I could not believe how much extra time I had now that I was not drinking. Geno had made an Oreo Cheesecake and it looked like so much fun. A few days passed and I wanted to make a cheesecake, so I started with a simple cheesecake, a few days later there was an apple crisp, then a couple dozen mini cheesecakes, 1-2-3-4 cake with buttercream frosting, not as easy as the name may suggest, then a couple dozen chocolate chip cookies, most of these recipes were straight forward and required no creativity and I was starting to get bored… Ooh something shiny… then Mini Lava Brownies with Chocolate Ganache Drizzle happened. *mic drop* You are welcome!
(LAVA BROWNIES WITH GANACHE DRIZZLE)

Sunset Sandwiches:

The year prior to checking myself into rehab was one self- created dumpster fire after another. One does not usually end up in rehab after a wonderfully stable year. I spent most the year running away from the people who loved me most, especially my husband, Geno. Geno and I have been through some tough times in our relationship but this year was especially awful. I believe Queen Elizebeth II called it an “Annus Horribilis”, very fitting since this was the year Windsor caught fire and I spent the entire year trying to burn my life to the ground. I was in such a dark place and didn't even realize it, it was very scary and lonely inside myself and my outward side was the complete opposite. This duality in my life caused me to create a villain and sadly that villain was Geno. At one point in May I attempted suicide and almost succeded, Geno found me on the couch and called an ambulance, I woke up 2 day later in a mental hospital on suicide watch. The scariest part about that was I had no recollection of wanting to hurt myself or even thinking it through, all I remember is seeing darkness. I came home after seven days and I really thought I would slow down on the drinking and maybe I did for a little while but not long enough to remember. I remember thinking that I was loved becaused all my friends and family were so devastated at the thought of losing me, that feeling was lost again to the booze soon after.
That summer was a rollercoaster of huge fights, extended time away from each other, terrible things were said, and in October it all reached a climax and I threatened to leave Geno and went to stay with my cousin Mandi in Wisconsin with the rest of my family. My aunt Kristy and Grandma were exactly what I knew deep down they would be, honest as fuck! My grandma told me that I was “difficult, had lived a very charmed life and I should suck it up, go home and be happy with my husband”. My Aunt Kristy was brutally honest. She sat me down and asked me “What was going on?” when I started to tell her in my sugar coated everything will be fine, she called bullshit on me. She called out my drinking and told me I didnt even “resemble her nephew.” She also told me it was time to get my shit together. Kristy fought a long hard battle with addiction and has been happily sober for many years now. She said “Honey, I missed a lot of years of my life due to addiction.” She has now forced me to feel real emotions and I am open-mouth sobbing, she goes on, “You are going to lose them too or worse you will lose everything.”
It was the first time I was forced to see myself and the disaster I had become. A week later I flew home and checked myself into rehab. It was difficult to remember how to be happy with Geno, I had to retrain myself to love him the way he deserved to be loved and to see how much he loves me. In those first weeks we spent all day everyday together, it was amazing, for the first time in a long time we were not yelling and screaming at each other. One beautiful day we decided to go to the beach for a sunset picnic, it was the first time we had gone to see the sunset since we had quit drinking. The sunset was the most beautiful orange and glorious sunset, I was finally seeing my Geno, and he was all the light I needed. That sunset I fell madly in love with my husband again, oh and we had some sandwiches!

Hello Greece! I am doing a cooking challenge where each week, I cook food from a different country. Greece is coming up soon and I would love some help working out which dishes to make. It's not difficult to find Greek dishes since many are popular in other countries too, but I want to try and focus on the dishes you feel best represent your cuisine, rather than only what is popular overseas.
I usually have time to make a few main dishes throughout the week (with any appropriate sides), and I can also make breakfasts and maybe one dessert or sweet snack.
So far, I am interested in making:

• Moussaka - I read this is your national dish so I have to include it!
• Avgolemono - I read that this can be a soup or a sauce but I would like to make the soup
• Souvlaki with homemade pita
• Spanakopita
• Choriatiki
• Kolokythokeftedes

I came across lots of other dishes that also sound delicious but I can only do so much in a week. Please let me know what I should add to this list, or if there's something there that I should remove. Links to authentic recipes are welcome too if you have them (it's fine if they are in Greek; Google Translate has worked well for me so far).

Djamä Sonurupākä-Pēzjeceni stands, looking out over the labour before him. A series of four paddies are being built off of Dogwood-Point. Two of them dig earth from the point to make the paddy, the other two enclose rectangles of the lake with mounds of earth. To his rear, NāpäkoduThonu works on four paddies of their own.
The clans cooperated on the project, building the outer-walls together in the early-days of summer where the lake’s level gets low enough for it to be doable. Now they’re expanding their paddies in one of the biggest projects Konuthomu has ever known.
Sonurupākä’s main role is to direct. And he wears his resplendent cape of feathers to indicate such—even if he also wears the simple quarter-dome hat of a farmer. He sends the young men carrying baskets of earth to the eastern medial causeway. When needed, he steps in and offers aid. But in this moment, he puffs gently on his pipe. Enjoying the heady rush of fresh-air and warm smoke.
Someone calls him over, there’s a section of clay in one of the inner-paddies being excavated.
Screams fill the hall. Senisedjarha, his wife, is in labour. He was rushed away by the duNothudo as they take care of her. He was left mixing ashes for glaze and hearing his love’s cries from across the field.
This is their second child. Their first, a beautiful baby girl, is bouncing on her grandmother’s knee. It’s a good omen to have such a hardy first-born. But it doesn’t ease his anxiety at the second birth.
He mixes in the rotu ash—it should form a grassy green once fired—with the wet clay and stirs it vigorously.
The baby is coming later than expected. The duNothudo assured them that it wouldn’t be a problem, that the best fruit simply take longer to grow. He was supposed to be gone on a trading mission by this point. The canoes are already prepared. But it would be a variation from the kacä to abandon his wife now.
Next he mixes the birch ash—this one forms a creamy white, tinged with yellow. It’s almost a buttery colour.
Senisedjarha is strong though. And while the pregnancy has exhausted her, especially the past moon of it—her belly even more gravid than with the first pregnancy, the stores have been full and the weather kind. She’s been able to rest, drinking broth on their bed of furs.
Now, he mixes red slip with willow ash. This one is far more slip-forward. The ash gives it its sheen and flow, the bursts of colour and shine which makes the glaze all the more vibrant.
He’s to visit the land of the Rhadämā, those strange feather-less folk. Their cargo is wine (mostly maple), jade tools, and the glazed pots his current labour allows.
Finally, he mixes oak ash with bright-red slip. The smooth, green-blue glaze which results is perfect for lining urns. Some things you want to breathe through the unglazed clay, but others you want to keep sealed. It’s a delicate balance.
He pauses, unsure of the change and caught up in his work. The screaming has stopped. He rushes back to the house.
Two rambunctious baby boys. He holds Seni’s hand while holding the first-born of the two. An auspicious sign.
It had been a painful labour, and his wife’s exhausted. Drained. But two healthy baby boys. He can’t believe their luck. Two marriages of equal prestige to bring additional clans onto their path? It’s more than he could have ever hoped.
Knee deep in water, he guides the boat out. Full of pots, the canoes sit low in the lake. Eight men for eight canoes, a sizable contingent. He’s been tasked to bring gifts and trade in hopes of establishing a more permanent relationship with the Rhadämā of Kamābarha.
The Cakäma of DjamäThamä, where his two new sons will be given names, remains three turns away. He prays he’ll be back in time.
Clambering out of the lake, he readies himself to go. Even this early in the morning, he knows the day will be hot and a gentle mist rises with the sun over the lake.
He clasps the hands of the duNothudo in turn, pledging that he will travel honest and true. Laughing at Redotsuko’s quip. He finally reaches his wife, the youngest of the duNothudo, and the one most dear to him.
As they hug, she whispers in his ear: “Return swift and safe, your family waits for you.”
Speeches and recitations and other such fanfare follow, as Sonurupākä climbs into his canoe, and sets off towards the rising sun. His eyes may be wet, but his path is clear. Duties to clan come before all else, even these first few months of his sons’ lives. The paddling becomes rhythmic. There is only one way, and that is forward. He simply hopes, and prays, it leads him back home.
It’s their third day of travel. The weather has remained clear, and bright. Their first two nights they stayed in houses of DjamäThanä. Lovely, low provincial halls—not dissimilar to the one in which Sonurupākä was born and raised. A life a world away now, even if, in factuality, merely feather and name separates that him from the him in the canoe now.
He sips a skin of crabapplecider, and grabs a mouthful of the pickle mix: bison and pawpaw and sumac and blackberry and brire. It’s sour, a little salty. The sweetness and tartness of the berries cut through the rich fat of the bison. He’s dressed in a loincloth, a farmer’s hat (a round, quarter-dome offering shade protection) and has a plain-hemp cape hanging from his shoulders, protecting his back from the sun. It’s a lovely day.
Rowing once more, he thinks about his mission. Kamābarha is not alien to the people of Konuthomu. They may have forgotten their feathers, but they’re skilled craftsmen and produce a lovely nut. Travel is frequent between the villages. And even without feathers, the people govern themselves well. They know of the wisdom of crone’s, and put the vitality of young men to service. Sure, their way of speech may be harsher, atonal in a way. But it’s not that far off from Menidān, and easy to learn. Compare the language of Rhadämā to that of the Jeli—infrequent visitors here, but known further west. Rhadämā is a poem in the wrong meter, Jeli is more similar to the barking of dogs. But what can you expect from people with neither lake nor feathers?
Voyages such as this gives one plenty of time to think. He hopes his aids back home are preparing the pottery well. They’ve expanded the workshop below the Themilanan. Three kilns, a lengthy pottery space, plenty of storage for the clay. Small-folk of DjamäThanä do most of the actual pot construction, but the glazes are kept in the Themilanan. So too is the knowledge of organizing the fire for the kiln to burn properly hot. The duNothudo should assure his Good-Brother does the firing properly. He hopes so, at least.
They practice Rhadämā over dinner, forming the words again and again. Sonurupākä insists: passable is insufficient, his accent must be perfect.
They have easy access to food, with the plentiful waterfowl and fish, but he missed the plentiful wine and pickles of home. Rhadämā wine is tasty from what he remembers though.
After eight days of travel, they approach Kamābarha.

For context my husband and I adopted our sweet girl from the humane society last October. She is the sweetest most calm and gentle doodle I have ever met. She is very shy with people but likes other dogs and even cats. The issue is she is so stubborn and when it comes to chasing lizards, iguanas, ducks, baby chicks, squirrels etc. She manages to slip her leash in the most impossible ways and even her harness before ( even though I prefer the leash I tried a harness for a while because I didn’t want her to injure herself when she pulls ). The major issue is that we live in S.FL around multiple lakes and canals, she has jumped in multiple times chasing animals, and refuses to come out until she’s done. I’m afraid of the alligators because there are so many around the area as we’re right next to the Everglades !! She walks perfectly on the leash all other times and doesn’t even bark. She’s extremely mild mannered but her prey drive is so high when it comes to chasing and retrieving. Any tips on training, leashes, etc. ?? She is about 50lbs. I’ve tried high value treats while on walks but when she fixates on something she just won’t let it go and has laser focus. She won’t even pay me any mind !! I’m worried she could run into the street one day if she slips her leash , or worse. Please help !!